Why I’m 100% Behind the McCanns

There are two things which have really wound me up on the Internet over the last few months. One of them is Brexit (let’s not even go there), and the other one is Madeleine McCann. The subjects themselves are emotive enough, but what has really got my back up is reading people’s views and opinions on each matter. They have made me cry actual tears of frustration to the point where I’ve wanted to hurl my laptop/phone at the wall in anger.

The most recent cause of my disgruntlement has been an article doing the rounds again on Facebook. It was written back in February by probably the most hated woman in Britain (I can’t actually bring myself to type her name) who writes for the Daily Fail and looks like a horse. 

In it she stated, among other things, that Kate and Gerry need to stop looking for Madeleine and just let her go. Bloody hell. You can’t just let go of your child! Parents share an indestructible bond with their children, especially mothers, that you can’t simply just cut off. If it was Molly that was missing I would look for her every hour of every day until the day I died, even if the entire world told me to stop. While she is still missing, there is still hope, something Kate and Gerry state on their website.

This partiular article was shared on Facebook with most people actually agreeing with her. I read comments like ‘they killed Madeleine’, or ‘there’s more to this story that they’re not telling us’, or ‘they deserve everything they get’.

When Madeleine first disappeared back in 2007 I was exactly the same. When I heard that they had left their children alone I pretty much shrugged them off thinking ‘well what did they expect?’ That all changed though when I became a mother myself and after I read Kate McCann’s book ‘Madeleine’.

kate-and-gerry-mccann

Holidays

Some parents completely let their guards down whilst on holiday with their children. Everyone deserves a decent break away every year to somewhere nice and hot, away from the gloomy UK weather and the sometimes mundane routine of day to day life. 

Some people, however, think that being a parent stops the minute they step off the plane. That they’ve got a green light to get as pissed as they like every day and night because they’re on holiday, whether the kids are there are not. I have seen this first hand. 

We went to Mallorca in May and stayed in an all-inclusive, family orientated resort. I witnessed mums and dads drinking all day around the pool while their kids played unsupervised in the water. 

One guy stumbled around as he attempted to sooth a crying baby who was clearly too hot, with a fag hanging out of his mouth. 

I saw kids trying to climb over the guard rail on balconies on the fourth floor. The worst time was during the evening entertainment though. While most adults were sat at the tables oblivious to everything around them and downing drink after drink, their kids were running wild, sometimes down by the pool, sometimes by the entrance to the hotel which was next to a very busy road. 

Any screams would have been drowned out by the loud music and they would have been none the wiser. My own partner made a massive mistake too…

He had taken Molly up to the bar area to get her an ice cream while I stayed at the table. It was evening time and the place was packed. This is where being a super anxious mum paid off, as I was hyper vigilant on holiday. 

I watched John as he led her up to the bar by her hand, and I also watched as he bumped into a guy he knew and started talking to him while simultaneously letting go of it! 

Molly started to wander about, John completely unaware, at which point I flew out of my seat. I actually ran past him, grabbed Molly’s hand, took her to get an ice cream, walked past John again and brought her back to the table. He still didn’t notice!!! 

After 5 minutes of talking to that guy he finally said goodbye and looked down to find that, obviously, Molly wasn’t there. 

I watched his face drop, he turned white as a ghost, and I let him. I wanted him to feel that panic and remember that feeling forever because I couldn’t believe how irresponsible he had been. 

He started running up and down screaming her name. He ran down to the pool which was directly below the bloody bar where she could easily have fallen in. He ran back up and finally looked at me with tears in his eyes at which point i mouthed ‘she’s here’. 

He was shaking and crying when he got to us, but all I could say was “that’s how bloody easy it is”! And he hadn’t even had a drink!

We make judgements as parents every day, most of the time in the blink of an eye, and they’re not always the right ones. I will never agree with the fact that Kate and Gerry left their children alone in an apartment while they went out for a meal, that is something I would never do. 

However, as Kate states in her book, she actually felt that they were safe. She believed, along with her husband and all the other adults in their group who had also left their children alone, that nothing would happen in a gated, secure holiday complex. 

These are professional, responsible adults, they’re not teenagers who had kids too young and decided to piss off clubbing for the night. They made a decision, albeit a bad one, but I don’t believe they wilfully neglected their children. 

The apartments were in clear view of the restaurant and they were checked on every half hour. I’m not saying it’s right, what I’m saying is that they felt comfortable enough in that atmosphere, with their guards down, to leave them. They believed that the children were perfectly safe, and as they had done this for three or four nights during the holiday with nothing bad occurring, they carried on doing it. 

Abduction was the last thing on their minds. Little did they know that they were being watched. Their consistent half-hourly checks were ultimately their undoing. Kate also didn’t realise until that fateful night that the windows could be opened from the outside. She never would have left them alone otherwise. The consequence of that lack of judgement is now all too painfully apparent, and they are paying the ultimate price.

Lynch mob

What amazes me is how controlling the media are in this country. Our trashy tabloids can make up any old bullshit and just like that the masses are brainwashed…it must be true, I read it in black and white! 

The Sun’s coverage of the Hillsborough disaster is a prime example of how damaging it can be. At first the media were on the McCann’s side, after all this was a major story, and everyone just wanted Madeleine to be found. However, as time went on, and the unbelievably incompetent Portugese police still had nothing to go on, everyone turned on them. 

To cover up their own failings (not securing the crime scene, not interviewing potential witnesses, not putting out an alert for a missing child to name but a few) the police pointed their dirty fingers at the parents, and our media lapped it up. 

They also failed to mention that there were reports in the previous weeks of men breaking into holiday apartments and getting into bed with children! Again, the police never followed these up. 

In the absence of the best headline anyone could wish for i.e. Madeleine being found, this was the next best thing…‘BREAKING NEWS…The parents did it’! The amount of lies that were spread about the McCanns (they drugged their children/they murdered Madeleine and buried her in the mountains etc) was just unbelievable. 

All of these have been discussed and discounted in Kate’s book by the way. However, mud sticks, and instantly they became public enemy number 1.

What annoys me the most about social media, especially Facebook, is that people would rather believe a ridiculous made up meme, or a one-line quote created by some geek in their bedroom, than actual facts. 

What’s worrying is that anyone can make up anything they want, and thousands, even millions of people will fall for it. Facebook is the modern day version of a lynch mob, with people blindly believing any old codswallop, ‘liking’ and sharing pictures that anyone with half a brain cell can knock up in 5 minutes with Photoshop. 

I think the most ridiculous one I have come across relating to this case was a picture of Gerry next to a picture of the man suspected of taking Maddy saying ‘coincidence’?!!! Honestly. If people actually did a tiny bit of research (it’s not hard, just use Google more instead of Facebook, or, shock horror, read an actual book) they would uncover the truth, not just a pack of lies pasted on to a fake photograph. 

But that’s much too hard though isn’t it?! I’m all for lively debate and people expressing their opinions, but please just base your arguments on facts and not bullshit!

Support

Think back to the worst mistake you ever made, or your biggest regret. I bet it still fills you with dread every time you think about it right? So you try to block it out of your mind and move on. 

Now imagine that people remind you of that mistake every single day of your life without fail. How fucking awful would that be? That is the precise reason I fully support the McCann’s. 

Yes they made a huge mistake, but they are paying for it, bitterly, every single day of their lives. The image that Kate says haunts her is of Maddie first waking up and seeing a stranger instead of her own mum and dad. If that isn’t enough punishment I don’t know what is. 

We can sit around all day and point out people’s wrong doings (we’d be here all day with mine), but what the hell is productive about that? I don’t remind John every day of the mistake he made on holiday, because he’s learned his lesson. 

The actual real crime that was committed on that night in Praia da Luz was of a man breaking into an apartment and taking a sleeping child from her bed. A man who has pretty much gotten away with murder because everyone else is far too busy having a go at the parents. Poor Maddie didn’t stand a chance.

Another thing the McCanns have been criticised for is for using tax payer’s money and constantly being in the public eye. My god, if it was my daughter that was missing I would beg, steal and borrow to make sure her face was plastered over every newspaper in the world…the public would be sick of the sight of me! 

And if I had a choice over whether my hard earned tax money was spent on looking for a missing child or funding MP’s expenses/bailing out arrogant bankers/paying for bone idle benefit cheats who would rather sit on their ass than get a job, I know which one I’d choose!

It took me ages to pluck up the courage to actually read Kate’s book. A missing child really is every parent’s worst nightmare. As a mum I felt it so acutely, I actually winced one or two times, hoping that if I stopped reading then Madeleine would be safe. 

But it did happen. A tiny 3 year old girl was snatched from her bed in the middle of the night, and Kate’s heart will forever be broken. Not only does she have to live with the endless images of what her daughter might be going through day in and day out, she also has to endure the never ending onslaught of abuse by complete strangers.

I’m glad I read the book, it completely changed my opinion and I discovered actual facts about the investigation that were never published in the media. Also all the royalties are donated to Madeleine’s fund so in a small way I feel like I’ve helped. 

No matter what people’s opinions are of the McCanns, I would hope that everyone agrees that no parent should have to endure that amount of torment and heartache, and that they deserve to know what happened to Madeleine, either way.

I fully support their continuing search for their daughter and commend them for never giving up, after all, what’s the point in living if you never have hope?

maddie

Mummascribbles

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20 thoughts on “Why I’m 100% Behind the McCanns

  1. Hey,
    I love that you are tackling this – its a real tough one. There seems to be quite damning evidence to suggest that perhaps something unthinkable did happen that night.
    Of course I don’t know all of the facts – none of us really do. I do know that I would never leave my children in a hotel room or apartment and go and have dinner though. And sadly that was a choice the parents made – whichever theory you believe, fundamentally no one is perfect, parents aren’t perfect. But I disagree entirely with their choice to leave their babies alone.
    big love,
    L
    xxx
    #twinklytuesday

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I disagree with their choice too, but the point I’m trying to make here is that we can all point out what they did wrong all day, it won’t help bring Maddie back or try to find the actual perpetrator of the crime. There’s definitely no damning evidence either to suggest that Maddie was harmed or that her parents had anything to do with it. All this was proved in a court of law. I would definitely recommend reading Kate’s book, you wouldn’t believe the injustices they faced, most of which was never published in our media x

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hats off to you for writing this. It’s a story that as hard as it is, I’ve stayed up to date with it as much as possible. I read the book before we even got pregnant with my little boy – who is now the same age as Maddie was when she disappeared. That makes me shudder just thinking about it. I went to Portugal on holiday one year, again before Ethan. While we were there I went to Luz. I don’t know why but I wanted to make the journey to go there. It’s such a beautiful part of Portugal that to a lot of people is now tainted but such a tragic tragic story. We all know what they did is wrong & we can all criticise but at the end of the day they have lost their child and may never ever know what has happened to her. Every parent’s worst nightmare. It’s so so sad & I hope one day they get some answers. Poor Maddie. Bless her heart. #twinklytuesday

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s exactly why I support them, they are doing everything in their power to get their baby back, and on top of that having to deal with complete strangers abusing them day in and day out. I can understand why some people are against them, but why go to the lengths of writing vile letters/posting disgusting comments etc. They are clearly suffering enough. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it! X

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It seems that the reason why you are 100% Behind the McCanns is because and I quote your own words, “These are professional, responsible adults, they’re not teenagers who had kids too young and decided to piss off clubbing for the night. They made a decision, albeit a bad one, but I don’t believe they wilfully neglected their children.”

        Unlike teenagers who had kids too young and decided to piss off clubbing for the night, professional, responsible adults don’t wilfully neglect, harm or abuse children do they? Like hell they don’t. Unlike those disadvantaged teenagers, professional and seemingly responsible adults also commit crimes against children and wilfully too.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank you for your comment. Yes professional people do harm children wilfully, but not in this instance. Yes they left their children alone, which I will never agree with, but the point I’m trying to mood that they actually felt they were safe in that environment. As I explained, people let their guards down on holiday and their judgment was wrong. They made a bad decision, as we all do sometimes, but pointing fingers won’t bring Maddie home. The actual crime is of a man taking a child from her bed, which, amazingly, no one seems to talk about!

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  3. I have been back and forth with this over the years. Part of me thinks that the actions of the Mccanns are highly suspicious and then the other part of me thinks that we never know how we would react should the same happen to us, although I DO know that I would never have left my children alone for even one moment. It’s heartbreaking to think that happened that night, I doubt we will ever know, but I do believe that Madeleine died either on that night or shortly afterwards, I think it’s so sad that her parents don’t have that closure, it must be a living nightmare. #TwinkyTuesday

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It is difficult what to believe, especially when our own media have blatantly made up lies. I read Kate’s book and took it as a mother who just wants her baby back, and no one deserves to go through that pain x

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  4. This is a huge complex thing to discuss. I agree with you totally that they can never (and should never) give up hope or stop searching.
    I admit I have judged them for leaving the children alone. It was a bad decision and one that I honestly believe would have seen other parents in a similar situation face legal consequences for. Had they been teenage parents making that decision rather than doctors they would have been prosecuted im sure.
    I do not believe they had anything to do with the dissapearance. They are lies and rumours spread by spiteful individuals such as the woman you wont mention.
    Some people are happy to believe these stories though and I think it is not just due to malice. By placing the blame at the parents door, they are rationalising what happened, and im doing so they can feel safe that it would never happen to their children.
    (Sorry for the long winded comment) #TwinkleTuesday

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I totally agree with you. At the end of the day there is no actual evidence to suggest that anything happened to Madeleine other than abduction, with several witnesses actually seeing a man walking away with a sleeping child. What amazes me is that no one actually talks about this, they’re just intent on having a go at the parents who are clearly suffering enough x

      Liked by 1 person

  5. You’ve written this really well. Hard subject to tackle, everyone and his wife has an opinion on it. Personally, I can’t help but think, taking all of the evidence that has been released into the public domain into account, there is more to this tragic tale than meets the eye.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! There’s still no evidence to suggest that anything happened to Madeleine other than abduction, otherwise her parents would have been prosecuted by now. The reason I support them is that they made a huge mistake it are paying bitterly for it, and I just hope they find out what happened to her, either way c

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  6. Really great post. I felt shaky leaving my daughter to sleep in our villa on holiday because it had a balcony door that I was convinced someone might try to come through, so I would never feel comfortable leaving her and going out. That said, I can’t imagine what the parents already go through on a daily basis wishing they’d done things differently, let alone with the abuse they suffer. And as for that horsey woman, well don’t get me started!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I was exactly the same as you on holiday, I don’t think I relaxed the entire time! This post has caused a lot of controversy already, can’t believe how hated the McCanns are, when really it should be the man that abducted her that people should hate! Thanks for commenting x

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  7. Oh wow Kerry you weren’t lying when you said it was a controversial one. But well done you for tackling a really difficult subject and actually putting your views out there. It is your blog after all. Like yourself I will never ever agree with the parents for leaving their three children alone. You wouldn’t dream of it in the UK, and as you demonstrated you watch your children like a hawk (well most of us do) and this is something I just can’t overlook regardless. That being said I completely agree with the social media side and the whole meme – everyone is entitled to an opinion but sometimes expressing them so boldly, freely and repetitively online is going to do nothing! Great on you for a difficult matter! x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! I actually didn’t think it was controversial at all when I posted it, until I had a few nasty comments on Twitter. A lot of them were trolls with no profile pictures who are basically there to bring the McCanns down at every opportunity. Quite sad really. It’s taught me that you need a thick skin to be a blogger, but also that you have to stand up for what you believe in no matter what! X

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